Merry Christmas

I think it's a toss up on which is the more un-Christmasy song, but since I like them both, here they are.
Holly Jolly.


Christmas in Paradise

Fairytale of New York

Julian ASSange

Come on, someone had to write that. No matter how feel about the Wikileaks big man and his penchant for publishing secret documents, you will have to agree he is a complete ass after reading these emails from him to a woman who wanted nothing to do with him.

Still waiting for more dirt on him, but this is a good start...

Tea Time

You know, these Tea Baggers, er, Tea Party-ers, have been getting a hell of a lot of press lately,and it made me wonder: WHY?

Honest to god, the people are just plain annoying. Actually, they are worse than annoying, but I'm in a good mood today.

And now the Teabagger that stomps on women who are being held down wants the victim to apologize. I hope this is the death knell for these dopes.

*click me*

Hidden Treasure

So my battery died(again) in my ancient Camry. Hey, the thing is pushing 235k miles, what do you expect? That car will last forever, and yes I know, I am not helping the economic recovery by holding onto a 17 year old car.
Anyway, the damn battery dies and I was away from home so I called AAA to jump the thing. I know, or have heard..or maybe saw it on the internet, that you are supposed to drive around for about 20 minutes after jumping the battery to "recharge" it. I decided I'd head out to Pt. Molate since I'd always seen the sign for that place and had never been out there. Well, the damn park is closed...no money (surprise) so I kept driving back around that area to see what I would see.
If you are not familiar with the area, it runs long the Bay on the other side of the Standard oil refinery. There is a strange mixture of government owned land/buildings and Refinery owned land, both with their own variety of signs admonishing you to stay the hell away from everything and don't drive down this dirt road and keep off that building, etc. Just the place where you want to wander around and explore old buildings and weird-looking industrial things.
Only, I saw a nice, paved road with a sign saying "Rifle and Pistol Range"...Hurray thought I, maybe I can stop by here some time and blast a few targets. I drive up the road and there's a guard shack with an old guy in it. He looks at me dubiously and when I tell him that I'd never been out this way, he says half-joking, 'So you're lost". I try to tell him about the battery and the recharging, but it starts to sound like the bad alibi of a suspected thief, so I switch gears and ask if the range is open to the public. He tells me it's not and allows me to pull a U turn in the lot by his shack.

After I got home, I had this nagging feeling...I really wanted to know how or why there was a shooting range in what looked like the Refinery. What to do? Oh, well of course, Google! They know everything...everything. They're like benevolent Gestapo. Sure they pry into every part of your life and know all about you, but look how smart and hip and young and cool they are! What's that? The cell on the right is mine? OK, no need to shove.

Where was I? Oh yeah, what lay over that hill past the Guard Shack I needed to know. Off I went to Google Earth and lo and behold, not only was there a shooting range, there was a pool, tennis courts, barbecues and a playground! Check out the shot below...I love this stuff. This hidden treasure..a little oasis in the shadow of the hulking, stinking refinery. Of course, it's off limits to you and me(unless you work for Chevron), but thanks to the magic of Google Earth, you can see it all. Almost. We need to get a Street View Car down there...

You can see the magical oasis here: (Click to enbiggen it!)

Aaaand...Action!

So I've been meaning to post some really great, hard-hitting stuff on the Tea Baggers(party)...but alas, I'm too lazy and easily distracted.
I saw this Mompetitors video on Consumerist and of course was drawn to the xtranormal site where you can make your own movie!
It's "text-to-movie", which is why the characters sound so robotic, although maybe the author of Mompetitors prefers that to make her point(?).
Anyway, watch this space for hilarious "text-to-movie" videos!

Goodnight Irene

I thought I'd talked about Grooveshark before, but I must have dreamed it. Grooveshark is a streaming music site, sort of like Mixturtle and the former lala, before it was assimilated by the Evil Steve Jobs.
What I like about Grooeshark though, is that you can not only search by title or artist, but it lists the album name as well. The fun things you find are, well, fun. I searched for "Goodnight Irene"...I'd only heard a version by Tom Waits (There is only one Tom Waits and his name is Tom Waits) and I found quite a surprise: Michelle Shocked's version was nice as was Johnny Cash's. The Pogues' version was a shambling mess as you'd expect, but the jewel may have been the version by the Chieftains with Willie Nelson, from the Another Country album.

I also found some interesting versions of "The Black Velvet Band". One was by a band called "Celtc Pride II", but I think that was a mistake. It featured a female singer with an accent I cannot place and it's driving me nuts...so, any help...
You might be able to listen to it here. I had to create an account to share it, you might have to do the same to listen to it.
It's fun to listen to several versions or covers of the same song...until your wife and kids go nuts hearing the fifth rendition of "Green Fields of France" and begin to throw whatever is handy at you.

Take your chances I say.

Amsterdamned

So those of us in California face a proposition on the ballot this fall(Proposition 19) which will essentially legalize the use of marijuana. Currenlty, "medical marijuana" is legal here and it seems that was the first step in a move to completely decriminalize it.
I always the thought the "medical" idea was kind of funny, not that there aren't benefits to its use for some people, but the fact that there is no real control...no control as to the levels of THC in the "medicine", no control on how much to take(prescription?), and the fact that so many "patients" take their dose right at the "pharmacy". I don't know, I just thought it was a "Emperor's New Clothes" thing, where I thought "Am I the only one who sees this for what it is?"

If Proposition 19 passes it wont matter anymore, but other things might. Here is an interesting article from the New York Times on how a Dutch city is dealing with the issue.

Surfin' USA

Really, they couldn't add a Beach Boy's soundtrack?

Irony

This is not ironic...or is it?

On A Lighter Note

Thanks everyone for your kind words and thoughts after Asher's death. We're still trying to get used to life without him around the house...Now we actually have to clean up whatever we drop on the floor in the kitchen, no more Asher standing by to grab whatever hits the deck.

I saw a link today to an "impossible soccer game"...a game in which Joseba Etxeberria, Athletic Bilbao's forward, promised to play against 200 local kids. It struck me becasue the team for which I am assistant coach had the same idea: Kids vs. grown ups. We only have 12 seven-year-olds, but still...

So, here's the video on the EITB sports site. It struck me as a great idea: Awesome for the kids and just a nice way to say thanks to the fans. But there was a comment on Digg that really made my day.
Someone 'Benny-Hillified' the video!Benny Hillifier Yes, it's exactly what it sounds like: Take a video and it will Benny-Hillify it by adding the Yakety Sax soundtrack!

And you can too! Just insert the URL of your favorite video and Voila! Instant idiocy!

I made This One

R.I.P Asher 1995-2010

My dog Asher passed away yesterday. He was 14 years old. I remember when I first saw him at the shelter...I wasn't even looking for a dog. I just used to go to the shelter to visit the poor dogs there and when I saw him, I had to take him home.
I almost didn't get to take him. Another person had seen him first and I didn't know there was a a "waiting list", only that I had to call on Monday to see if he was still available. Fortunately for me, he was.

Thus began a 14 year odyssey with sweetest(unless he didn't know you) and craziest dog you'd ever know. He had had such a 'sheltered' life in his first six months that he didn't know that he couldn't walk across water, and so his first introduction to swimming consisted of him trying to walk on the Bay, with predictable results. He was never a big fan of water after that.

His aloofnes and distrust of strangers earned him the moniker asher.mental when I worked at Red Herring, but after he got to know you, he was your friend for life.

When we brought him home, he met our cat, Spock, with whom he immediately wanted to play, much to Spck's dismay. After a while, they became the best animal friends ever and when Spock passed away a few years ago, Asher took the loss very badly. He never got over losing his best friend, and now I know how he felt.
I miss you Asher, you were a good dog.

Why does everyone hate us?

I know what you're thinking, Jersey Shore, right? Well, yeah, maybe, but that is a relatively new phenomenon, there must be something else that leads the world to hate Americans...something enduring, something that's been happening continually over the past few decades.
There is. It's our absolute helplessness in our lives. It's the incredible obstacles we have to overcome in our daily lives, just to remain happy. Tings like not spilling milk all over the table, getting our shoes on without having to bend over, organizing our ever-growing pile of useless CRAP!


Yes, we Americans have it so tough. Apparently we really have a problem with cooking and eating...Meanwhile, a large portion of the world's population is just trying to get enough to eat. In Haiti, they eat dirt cakes.
Also, our uncoordinated and weak pets need a lot of assistance.
I watch this video an cringe. I love the looks of utter despair on their faces!
"Oh what's the use of living, this is not a soft-boiled egg!"
"I just can't keep my storage containers organized! What ever will I DO??"
Man, if this is all you had to go on to get an idea what Americans were like, you'd think we were a nation of spoiled, lazy and stupid losers who can't handle the slightest obstacle in life. Luckily this isn't all the world has to go on....There's also Fox News.

Web$ites

Back in the early Nineties, when the TV show Cops was in full swing, I remember thinking that Reality TV was the future! Unfortunately, I did not know how to capitalize on that.
Now it appears the money-related websites are the new wave of the future. I base this on two, two!, observations:
One was the Cars For A Grand Site(which is still awesome by the way), and the latest is Fiverr(via The Consumerist). This site is devoted to people offering to do things for five dollars. That's right, five bucks! What can you get for five bucks these days? Well, apparently, having your likeness made into a Cartoon or anAnime Characteris pretty popular.
But I like the guy who will hold a poster with your name on it, stand in front of the Sydney Opera House and have a picture taken the best. Because, really, what the hell is that?

P.S. I have no idea how to capitalize on this trend either, but I'm thinking of a quick way to make five bucks!

Happy St. Pat's!

A little cheer from Jonathan Swift:
"All folks who pretend to religion and grace,
Allow there's a HELL, but dispute of the place:
But, if HELL may by logical rules be defined
The place of the damned -I'll tell you my mind.
Wherever the damned do chiefly abound,
Most certainly there is HELL to be found:
Damned poets, damned critics, damned blockheads, damned knaves,
Damned senators bribed, damned prostitute slaves;
Damned lawyers and judges, damned lords and damned squires;
Damned spies and informers, damned friends and damned liars;
Damned villains, corrupted in every station;
Damned time-serving priests all over the nation;
And into the bargain I'll readily give you
Damned ignorant prelates, and counsellors privy.
Then let us no longer by parsons be flammed,
For we know by these marks the place of the damned:
And HELL to be sure is at Paris or Rome.
How happy for us that it is not at home!"
-Jonathan Swift

I have no idea...

It sure is fun to watch though. Oh, and in Soviet Russia, song sings YOU!



Here is a supposed explanation of what you just saw.

Even more and better info HERE with graphs!!

What's The Frequency Kenneth?

I was reading an article in Computer Power User magazine(more about that name later)that floored me. It wasn't really an article, more of a side bar. The gist of it was that RCA has developed a device that you can plug into your mobile phone that will suck the energy from WiFi signals to charge your battery. It's called the Airnergy.

I know...that's what I said. But Gizmodo has a write up on it too.(On the internet, must be true, etc.,etc.) So this thing converts Wifi energy...great, so why aren't we converting radio waves? Are they too weak? Will it distort the signals so Lady GaGa or the Black Eyed Peas will sound lamer than they already do??
I'm not an Electrical Engineer...I can install a ceiling fan, so, yeah, that's the exetent of my knowledge. But, I immediately envisioned people modding these things and hacking their Priuses(Prii?)to take advantage. Imagine a herd of them parked outside a Starbuck's feeding off the wireless teat of the global caffeine giant.

Ew.Anyway, more Priuses that currently congregate outside a Starbuck's.

As far as the name of that magazine goes: Pure Genius. No, I'm not talking about the clever abbreviation of CPU. I'm talking about having the "Power User" in the title of the magazine you're reading.
"Yeah, I'm a Power User baby...overclockin'!" Well, maybe not.But I'm sure someone thought that would be a good idea. Kinda like how I always have a copy of the Scientific American in my back pocket.

Recession-Proof Cars

What a time to buy a car....Toyotas and Hondas have lost their appeal as the flawless vehicles we once thought they were. In the meantime, the truly flawed cars like Chevys and Chryslers are, well, still flawed. I guess you could get a Ford, but now they'll have you over a barrel since they're nearly the only game in town. Oh, there are Nissans, Mazdas, Volvos and BMW's, but let's be honest here, who has any money?

Not me. Hell, I drive a car my sister who, in better times, gave to me when it hit 180,000 miles. It was pretty rough and had a missing passenger-side mirror(still does), so I guess she figured it wouldn't be around much longer. I recently rolled over the 230,000 mark. So when I see cars for sale, I actually look at old cars and the better the deal, the better it looks.

So Cars For A Grand really caught my eye the other day when I saw it featured on Jalopnik. I mean, a car for a thousand bucks? Are you kidding me? Well, for some, yeah, they are.

The guys who started the site have an application that scours the interwebs for cars listed for $1000 or less. Now, a lot are on eBay, and have a low starting bid and will probably wind up above a grand, but who knows?
You can find sub-grand cars, like this one. Wow, what a pedigree though: It overheats, battery is dead and the Bondo is cracking. Good times. Of course, if you,re at all handy with cars, or enjoy bashed and bleeding knuckles, you're all set!

I haven't seen a Trabant on there yet, but I swear I saw Jim Anchower's Ford Festiva on it the other day!

More Ranting on Banks...Now with alternatives!

Thanks to The Consumerist!. Remember my rant below about banks, capitalism and entrepreneurs? Yeah, I kinda hope you don't either.
Anyway, I was checking out The Consumerist when I saw this most awesome post on punishing the Big Banks. Bonus points that it links to the MoveYourMoney site, which has on its homepage a video that begins with clips from "It's A Wonderful Life"...Most awesome.
Better yet, there's a place on moveyourmoney to find local banks near you based on your zip code. My wife and I have been talking about this for the last couple of years, and by god now is the time!

Being Resolute

Some people make New Year's resolutions....not me. I just write a ranting, incoherent blog post about the state of the economy. That and take the family to the Japanese Tea Garden in San Francisco.And why not? The weather is great(sorry rest of the country) and I had time off of work.

One of the most famous sites in the Tea Garden is the Drum Bridge (Taiko Bashi). As a kid I remember the one time my parents took me there and I immediately had to climb over the bridge when I saw it. I had no real appreciation for the work that went into it, nor the beauty of the arc reaching over the tiny stream below.

At that time, I'm sure there was no plaque in place explaining the origins of the bridge, but today there is. I made it a point to read it, as so often I pass by these things or just give them acursory glance. I was truly amazed at what I read(and very disappointed afterward that I could find so little on the subject online).

The story goes like this: Shinshichi Nakatani was
commissioned by the government of Japan to create a Drum Bridge for the 1894 San Francisco Midwinter Fair. He came to San Francisco in the early 1890's and found that he did not have the materials he needed, so had to travel back to Japan, where he built the bridge. It was blessed and disassembled, then shipped to San Francisco. The project ran out of money however, so Nakatani-san went back again to Japan to sell his family's rice fields to raise the needed funds.

OK, stop there. Travelling between Japan and the U.S. in the 1890's isn't like a Jet Blue trip to Miami. It's grueling days at sea, with no guarantee you'll even arrive. On top of that, he sold his family farm to complete this job he was entrusted with.

He then asked his son to remain in the U.S. for nearly fifty years in order to work and save enough money to buy back the family farm.

Why had I never heard of this?? I was was honestly dumbfounded after reading that. I ran to catch up with my wife and kids and led tham back to the plaque and read the story to them. I felt like this man and his son needed a lot more recognition for their contributions than just this sign next to tthe bridge. I could not find the words to explain to my daughters the level of responsibility, honor and perseverance this man had. I will never look at that the bridge the same
...I will always think of Shinshichi Nakatani travelling half way around the globe, twice, to ensure the bridge found its rightful place as promised.

Please visit the Nakatani Family web site for more detailed and better researched information.

In searching online for information, I ran across these San Francisco Recreation and Parks Commission Minutes. See page 2 for some of the controversy surrounding the placement of the plaque.